2021.09.20 01:38 starborn323 Jedi Og - If you need a friend DM me
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2021.09.20 01:37 Alarmed_Intention893 join fast nl group
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2021.09.20 01:37 EZ4396 Lost sushi reward token when I remove from farming. It’s under polygon network. I still got my wmatic reward token. Any idea what happened?
2021.09.20 01:37 queenofsuccubi Sunshine
If that was you 😂 you look fuckin rough bud. Hittin the lines a little to hard? Smoked your ass & you shake your head at me? Angry you cant whip it anymore old man?
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2021.09.20 01:37 theunits Shame when a great artist is repelled by some of his best work
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2021.09.20 01:37 TheReadingChicken Certified bruh moment
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2021.09.20 01:37 esporx Nike and Amazon among brands advertising on Covid conspiracy sites
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2021.09.20 01:37 Dear-Somewhere-9734 Hey everyone will soon have 15 spots open on our Task Force! “We’re not hardcore or anything all we do is OPs and have fun playing”Hit me up if you’d like to join
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2021.09.20 01:37 Calm_seesh Am I missing something?
I just took my first practice test (Science) and I've received my score of 159, but it won't show me the exact questions I missed so that I could go over it myself. Instead, it offers more study guides/books at a cost. Why do I need to pay more money to even know what I need to study rather than having the chance to look at exactly what I got wrong and looking into it independently (for free). Am I missing a part where it gives you that option, or is it intentional so they can take more of peoples' money? I'm a bit upset about this, lol.
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2021.09.20 01:37 mikefellow348111 Repotted Jade. Potting advise comments welcome.
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2021.09.20 01:37 kidswwithoutideas Where do they talk about dream's dumper on the supermegacast
2021.09.20 01:37 WIDEHARDO______ Hasan puts a chatter on suicide watch
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2021.09.20 01:37 anxietysalad Is my academic career over?
Hi all. I’m a phd student at a US university, currently in my 8th year but with no publications. For the past 6 years I’ve been working mostly on the same problem, but, whenever I reach a landmark, my advisor raises the bar for me to publish the work. The problem itself is quite difficult and their goals are very ambitious (possibly driven by the fact that it’s not in their main area of expertise), so the work that I’ve done has, admittedly, many loose threads. I’ve written an entire paper in the past on my advisor’s request, but they refused to submit it in the end, claiming that the work needed to be further extended. I worry that this will keep happening indefinitely. They also are against conference papers and most students in my research group finish their degrees with no publications whatsoever. I have been told that I can graduate and leave with no publications, if I would like to do so. On top of that, I’ve failed to build a network and make contacts outside of my department. I don’t know who I can turn to ask for help. I am constantly worried that this means that I am very unlikely to be able to further pursue my career in academia, which has been my main goal. Has anyone gone through a similar situation? Did you manage to continue with your academic career in the end? Any advice is kindly welcome!
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2021.09.20 01:37 PlantTreesEveryday Rapid installation update of Western Dedicated Freight Corridor
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2021.09.20 01:37 BlackSheep717 A Day in the Life
My one friend encouraged me to post here, regarding a breakup, although I'm not sure really what to say; I've rewrote this post a thousand times, trying to chisel it down to a nice, concise post. But, I decided that is not really what would help me, so I'm going to take my time and the space I have been afforded here to tell my story however long it takes. And it will be a little lengthy. It's going to be more of a journal, but it would be nice if you'd read it. Journaling helps for anyone remotely interested in giving it a go; throughout the day it's like we pick up little puzzle pieces that only writing can put together into a clear image. Feel free to read through, skip around, or read the TDLR. Either way, thank you.
The cast of characters includes a few people, my ex and my two roommates. I started dating Eve almost a year-to-date after I slipped into a really difficult, depressing time in my life. Up until last year, I have fought desperately to get myself to a place where I was even just okay. To dilute details at risk of going on a tangent, I was raised by addicts fighting their own demons, and subsequently homeless until I got into a four-year college so that I would have a place to sleep. Here I had trouble dating due to childhood baggage, but worked through it one partner at a time. Despite everything you will read, Eve really helped me jump my last baggage-hurdle: that of commitment. My academic career really flew off, and I graduated with a double-major and a double-minor and now, a certified teacher. I learned to make wine, identify birds, become a ferocious reader, draw well, sign and work with the Deaf community, meditate, and so on. Many personal dragons were slayed, and I was able to start discovering myself and becoming very confident in who I am.
When I met Eve, I was overcoming the reverberations of a serious psychedelic fallout; Despite being a psychedelic veteran, I took a small, 1/3 grams of shrooms in the Adirondacks last July and went spiraling, dealing with depersonalization and derealization for months afterwards. For those who are unfamiliar, psychedelics are not a party drug, but something to use for a little introspection. If you're going to use it to have fun, you're probably going to mess up--like weed, psychedelics bring whatever anxieties to the forefront of you mind and force you to deal with them. Sounds terrifying, but it is very therapeutic, and I am way stronger now than ever before. Paradoxically, when you take a small amount of psilocybin (the psychoactive component in mushrooms), your brain cannot acclimate properly. Whether psychedelics or marijuana, the arch of one's trip follows that the pattern of "climb," "plateau," and "fall." When you climb and fall, your brain is constantly changing states of consciousness, which may help explain why you're mood and energy is way more volatile during those periods. Oddly enough, the smaller the dose, the higher the risk for a bad trip. When you plateau, your brain can "settle" into the new state of consciousness for a long period of time. So, I basically climbed, hit an apex, and immediately crashed, meaning I spent over six hours uncomfortable and volatile. Mixed with a bad set and setting, I fucked up. Just some unsolicited psychedelics facts for you.
So I had bad trip during the worst possible time in my adult life: I succeed academically, finically, and socially in college despite the shortcomings of not having a family or really any supporting backbone, but I now had to figure out my next steps. I was punted right into adulthood, so I had to move from my college apartment...to where? I have no family. Do I follow my friends? Follow my job? What do I do if I can't get a teaching job? Live in a small apartment that will inhibit my hobbies? Or get a unaffordable place to live comfortably? Mixing in that bad trip into the cauldron of despair, I was a mess afterwards, just sitting on my couch for weeks hugging a pillow in shock from my trip and stress. I ended up moving near my hometown where I could at least be near my surrogate family, a nice couple who had looked after me in high school. Here, I met Eve and things went really well from the get go, probably because I was really happy to make a connection with someone when my others had dissolved with my move-out of my college town.
Things with my surrogate family were tumultuous and while we are fine now, we quickly got into a fight and that relationship was temporarily inaccessible. Eve was a real pick-me-up, though. After our second date, she was staying in my apartment almost every day, whether I was home or not. We bonded over our mutual sufferings: she was living with her alcoholic step-mother after her father had passed away just a few months prior. Home life was awful for her, and her biological mother distant. We had each other and our relationship took off at light speed. Many of my friends warned me about getting too entrenched with a girl who has been hospitalized for mental illness and has "nothing going on for her." But truly, she's a sweet sensitive girl deep-down, despite the remainder of the story. We got together in September and she moved in to my apartment in November, when her step-mother decided to move to Florida. We didn't want to let our relationship go. I was teaching, high on life, while she was unemployed and doing... "okay," despite the difficulties she was going through. She needed medication, so I'd pay out of pocket for her. Medication was unavailable? I spent money for weed as some self-help for her, per her pleas. I was too experimenting with different mental health medications per the recommendation of my psychiatrist, which made me gain all the weight I had lost and college plus some. We needed more groceries, and I paid for that too. Suicide hotline preventions were a regular call, and razors in the house were hidden. I desperately encouraged her to try to get a license, health insurance, a therapist, a job--anything that would ground her and give her a direction. She often became upset because I was "hounding her," and maybe I was. At first, I felt that she needed to do these things due to my "prestige, elite" mindset. I'm an ambitious dude, so I wanted her to follow her dreams and passions, which she has many. She's a smart cookie, and I can see her doing well. But, I slowly learned that a part of loving is letting people unfurl the way they are meant to unfurl. If she doesn't want the life I imagine she could have, then I need to respect that. Respect, in this manor, is a important component to loving as philosophical psychologist Erich Fromm articulates in his book The Art of Loving. Highly recommend. So I backed off, excluding encouraging her to find someone to talk to. Another great, unsolicited book recommendation: Maybe You Should Talk to Someone, by Lori Gottlieb.
Eventually, we decided to move to a different location in New York in January of 2021, as my hometown was bumming me out. My one college roommate, Sam, excitedly decided to move in with us as well. We got a four-bedroom house, and I quickly scooped up a dog as I promised myself I would do as a graduation gift for myself. God I love my dog--pics on profile. The move-in was fine, but financially draining. Eve could not afford anything, so I obliterated my savings paying for two security deposits, double-rent for three months, groceries, pet bills, her medicine, and so on. The beginning was great, despite this. Passionate sex, trips, and fun. Eve and Sam clicked immediately and the three of us did a lot together: trips, movies, etc. Neither has any friends, so I encouraged this. Over time, the two of them bonded over the unbelievable similarities they had. Weed, movies, video game titles, antiques--you name it and they both had it. I encouraged this friendship, because I loved the both of them and despite their surface-level similarities, they bonded over their mutual battle with depression in whatever way it manifested in them. My roommate Nick moved in shortly after*.
In and around April, my birthday month, I fell into a deep depression. Birthdays have always been difficult growing up for obvious reasons, but now I was more alone than ever, and it was mostly overlooked by the people I lived with. I suppose that serves me right, as I was not as attentive to Eve's birthday a few months prior, who probably needed much needed extra support. So I'm depressed. My interests ceded into the farthest back of my mind. I was sleeping all day, and a volatile mess. Carly was also having difficultly talking to her moody boyfriend and decided to spend more time with Sam. Without me feeling good and willing to do things, the exchange of hands from me to Sam enabled her to spend all of her days smoking pot, eating junk food, and not spending time with me. At heart, that is what the girl wanted--not a boyfriend, but someone who will enable her to do drugs and have no responsibilities. She had no call-to-arms for the responsibilities she had toward her own mental health, her education, or finically security, her pets, or the home she lived in. While I was losing money and sleep, Eve got a job working with Sam. Spending nine hours at work with him became 14 hours, when the two spending their evenings from 5:30-10:30 watching TV alone is accounted for.
One afternoon I walked downstairs--probably late in the day when I woke up--to see all of my plants dead. I was upset and decided to ignore it and take my dog out to play. After a few passes of her ball she quickly laid down panting, clearly out of shape. I haven't taken my energetic German Shepard out in so long, that she couldn't play long. I checked my bank account. Empty. Messaged friends. Read and unreturned. Later that night, I got stoned, and when I got stoned I realized how my depression had systemically destroyed all of the things I loved and suppressed any interest or passion I had for teaching, hobbies, and seeing friends. The next morning I wrote down a few lists, which I softly recommend to you, if you think it would be helpful: (1) The symptoms of my depression; (2) How my depression symptoms were affecting myself and those I care about; (3) How I can work toward reversing my depression-induced bad habits to fix all of the things I've broken. This helped and after a few weeks--each with one new goal to retrofit into my poor routine--and I really felt great. I began reproaching Eve with day-trip ideas, a high sex drive, and the desire to spend all of my time with her. But at this point, she too had fallen down and asked me to give her "space," which lasted for weeks. No touching, no sleeping in the same bed, etc. This was a far-cry from her former desire to spend time with me in every waking moment which has existed up until about early April 2021.
Her time not spent with me was spent exclusively with Sam, who is a real simp, and I don't say that lightly. When this was brought up, I was branded as "jealous," and how could I not be? Not only was she spending all of her waking hours with my best friend, but she started wearing his clothing, cuddling on the couch, eating dinner exclusively with him, and the list goes on. My other roomie, Nick*, and his girlfriend, were also reporting the same concerns to me as it was obvious that the potential for cheating was ripe. I told them that the only time I see her is when, and if, she comes to bed with me. From April to this mid-summer, this continued, and fights between us increased in both frequency and intensity. She again accused me of simply being jealous, gaslighting me and all of the other hot-button terms. She refused to listen to my concerns and pleas and after some nasty arguments, we had a fight which resulted in a breakup. All of her possessions where put into the spare bedroom where she now stays (kind of). I've been mentally clocked-out of this relationship for a very long time due to her distance, nastiness, disinterest, and honestly, being fucking mean. A few weeks after this break-up, I was chatting with some former friends, some of whom I had a semi-tense sexual relationship with. Simultaneously, Eve and I cooled down and talked about working things out. A few days within our peace-treaty talks, Eve snooped through my phone, and found my flirty messages, when I was just try to put myself back out there and satisfy the cravings for connection. We both agreed that it wasn't cheating--we broke up--but nevertheless she flipped out. I suppose that's on me, I don't really know. I've been in a bad place and have been emotionally cheated on. What else is there to do?
Now as the summer eclipsed into what is now the beginning of fall, she stays behind closed-doors with Sam in his room. The only way I know their alive is by the smell of pot that diffuses through Sam's door and the muffled sound of South Park reruns. She does not care for our pets--which includes a roaming band of three cats--and I found they have been left unfed and their litter box unkept, which was her job. Chores are never done as she smokes pot from sun-up to sun-down. She doesn't wash her clothing. She and Sam order out twice-a-fucking-day, and of course, she refuses to get help. She was sleeping exclusively in the living room until it excluded others from being able to sit and watch TV. When approached about this, we argued, and she begrudgingly slept in her own room--which I suspect is not every night, if you know what I mean. Sam knows I am not thrilled with him, so the emotionally ecology in our house is angry, depressed, and so tense you can feel it in your bones. Sam and Carly do not speak to Nick or I. And fucking shout-out to "Nick." He has been a real brother to me the whole time. He is moving to the city soon and I hope he conquers. Go you bro.
I have no money. I have no food. My credit is destroyed. I do not have a teaching job. I have no family, except my grandmother, who is in the hospital, dying. My friends are gone, merging themselves into the adult work with a seamless transition. I'm miserable.
That's really all I got. If you made it this far, then I honestly thank you for listening to me. Life is rough, then you dies. Please do not be afraid to comment, or PM me with any questions, comments, or thoughts.
"Even in our sleep, pain which cannot forget
falls drop by drop upon the heart
until, in our own despair, against our will,
comes wisdom through the awful grace of God.”
TLDR: My mentally-ill girlfriend moved in with me and she ditched me for my roommate.
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2021.09.20 01:37 kcei [US-CA] [H] Bauer 2 Poly (no extras) [W] Local / PayPal / Venmo ($1350)
Looking to sell a new Bauer 2, I opened just to make sure the condition is immaculate (it is). I live in the CA Bay Area, happy to meetup, otherwise Paypal/Venmo works for me.
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2021.09.20 01:37 robotdude56 Best blades for Andis T Outliners?
2021.09.20 01:37 __xnosleep__x Car meet ps4
2021.09.20 01:37 ItsYoshi64251 My [21M] mom [47F] told me my uncle [?M] told her I'm the cause for his son [20FTM] depression and suicide attempts.
2021.09.20 01:37 smarttailed Bellybutton with those wittle curled feetsies 😍😭
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2021.09.20 01:37 bmullenix [WTS] Blue Everest strap - fits all Montas
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2021.09.20 01:37 Shot-Union-4549 Need people to join to get that good stuff
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2021.09.20 01:37 hmm444 Estar em um bom relacionamento e mesmo assim ficar na fissura por outra pessoa
Isso está me deixando doente, no desespero mesmo
Desde que conheci essa pessoa, me apaixonei. Isso foi a 3 anos atrás. Fico pesquisando sobre a vida dela na internet, quero estar sempre onde ela está. Evito ter muito contato e conversar para não piorar a situação
É como ter vontade de comer algo diferente mesmo que a comida em casa seja a melhor do mundo
Alguém me dá uma dica de como tirar essas coisas da minha cabeça
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2021.09.20 01:37 Dr_memento_mori Oh lookie here, I need help again
I was trying to make a channel for an infinitely looping sound that goes with a music track and I got an error
```I'm sorry, but errors were detected in your script. Please correct the
errors listed below, and try again.
File "game/script-ch30.rpy", line 1: expected statement.
renpy.music.register_channel(oeoa, mixer=None, loop=None, stop_on_mute=True, tight=True, file_prefix=u'', file_suffix=u'', buffer_queue=True, movie=False, framedrop=False)
Ren'Py Version: Ren'Py 188.8.131.52.2187```
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2021.09.20 01:37 dromestwoply Tepid. I am remote. Dud. (A dude to mermaid I pet?)